Ok. Thats copied from very famous TV series by a famous actor.. dont want to increase my blog hits for mentioning them.. but I will always remember that the National Obsession of our country is Marriage !!
I used to think its only my parents .."You want to buy a house? Do it after your marriage", "You want to go somewhere ? Do it after your marriage" , "We will go on a India tour but after your marriage" , "We want to do something, but after your marriage" .. That's a different story that I did what I wanted to do after convincing them yet, getting them do what they want to "after my marriage" is something not attained it. It hurts, but then cant help :)
Recently I heard a similar case with one of my friends parents.. Its a little more crazy .. They are not ready to take up any treatment for their chronic ailments at a faraway place..till my friend's sister gets married !!
Earlier a few years back, I was at another friends place, where my friend's mom was telling her other daughter to not to take up medicine because it will be difficult to find a guy who will marry a doctor. The Aunty in question is a professor in a Engg. college.
The trigger for this post was actually a FB post from an acquaintance.. younger than me.. "Finally Climbed the ladder of Success....................pro
People who have commented hinted at her marriage getting fixed .. including her father saying "I am relieved"!!
I hope she is not talking about what I am assuming, but based on the overall tone and knowing her it seems to be the same.. and if it is then damn! Ladder of Success ?!?!
And its not just for girls.. One of my cousin was contemplating on selling off his business and taking up a job because he was not able to find a girl to marry !!
Some of my team-members wanted a transfer to locations other than Mumbai because back in their native Mumbai was supposed to be a dangerous place and girls would not agree to marry them !!
Not that I undermine the aspect that you require a life partner for companionship or sometimes put as a physical need or even the aspect of Security for women in the eyes of the Society - But should it really be sooo important that parents should put everything on hold for this ?
And then is there really a surety of having the required outcomes from a marriage? I have seen happy couples. But then I have also seen people struggling through their marriages, getting separated, being constantly unhappy in their marriages. Not really getting the companionship or even basic understanding from the partner is very common. An awful lot adjust with it for the society and the fear of gossip affecting their family.. and some do get out of it with repercussions..
But then, do we have to be so obsessed with it ? Whatever you plan to do, or wherever you plan to go - does it have to be always weighed against marriage ? The cases I have mentioned are very few from those I have seen.. There would be lot more..
I am not against the institution of marriage.. Someday I will get married too when I find the right person or when I am destined to or as my mother puts it "When the time comes" .. But till that time, is it really worth putting all decisions on hold for it ?
I used to think its only my parents .."You want to buy a house? Do it after your marriage", "You want to go somewhere ? Do it after your marriage" , "We will go on a India tour but after your marriage" , "We want to do something, but after your marriage" .. That's a different story that I did what I wanted to do after convincing them yet, getting them do what they want to "after my marriage" is something not attained it. It hurts, but then cant help :)
Recently I heard a similar case with one of my friends parents.. Its a little more crazy .. They are not ready to take up any treatment for their chronic ailments at a faraway place..till my friend's sister gets married !!
Earlier a few years back, I was at another friends place, where my friend's mom was telling her other daughter to not to take up medicine because it will be difficult to find a guy who will marry a doctor. The Aunty in question is a professor in a Engg. college.
The trigger for this post was actually a FB post from an acquaintance.. younger than me.. "Finally Climbed the ladder of Success....................pro
People who have commented hinted at her marriage getting fixed .. including her father saying "I am relieved"!!
I hope she is not talking about what I am assuming, but based on the overall tone and knowing her it seems to be the same.. and if it is then damn! Ladder of Success ?!?!
And its not just for girls.. One of my cousin was contemplating on selling off his business and taking up a job because he was not able to find a girl to marry !!
Some of my team-members wanted a transfer to locations other than Mumbai because back in their native Mumbai was supposed to be a dangerous place and girls would not agree to marry them !!
Not that I undermine the aspect that you require a life partner for companionship or sometimes put as a physical need or even the aspect of Security for women in the eyes of the Society - But should it really be sooo important that parents should put everything on hold for this ?
And then is there really a surety of having the required outcomes from a marriage? I have seen happy couples. But then I have also seen people struggling through their marriages, getting separated, being constantly unhappy in their marriages. Not really getting the companionship or even basic understanding from the partner is very common. An awful lot adjust with it for the society and the fear of gossip affecting their family.. and some do get out of it with repercussions..
But then, do we have to be so obsessed with it ? Whatever you plan to do, or wherever you plan to go - does it have to be always weighed against marriage ? The cases I have mentioned are very few from those I have seen.. There would be lot more..
I am not against the institution of marriage.. Someday I will get married too when I find the right person or when I am destined to or as my mother puts it "When the time comes" .. But till that time, is it really worth putting all decisions on hold for it ?
1 comment:
Hell No! Just the way for marriage, we often say 'when the right time comes' its true for other things as well.. like travelling, going for further studies and this right time could very well be before the marriage happens..
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