तो

असतो तो आसपास , इतरांसारखा. फार वेगळा नाही वाटंत. कोणाचा लक्ष सुद्धा जात नाही आणि कोणी ओळख पण दाखवत नाही
ग्रीष्म आला की मात्र याला धुमारे फुटतात आणि हळु हळु आपण त्याला बघू लागतो - कारण आपल्या लक्षात आलेलं असतं की अंगाची लाही लाही करणार्या वैशाख वणव्यातुन तावुन सुलाखून , सुर्यालाही लाजवणारी लाली पहरून आश्चर्यचकित करणारा हा गुलमोहर असतो

I realise its friday when..

.. when my mom wakes me up saying "Just today, tomorrow is a holiday for you"

.. when guys in my company bus dabble in bright colors like red and red and black

.. when one of my married colleague who lives in a joint family gets in a "oh no its friday" mode (dreading her weekend workload)

.. when I have to get my team to fill timesheets and ensure they have completed it

.. when I return back near home and our Istriwala (Laundry) shop is closed :P (Friday is their weekly off)

and then I realise that I can sit up late tonight and chat with my friends

Teacher and Ex

Some words never go together.. Like teacher and Ex.. have you ever heard someone , even yourself saying "I met my ex-Teacher today"? No ways.. Teachers never go Ex. It doesnt sound at all good.
This came up when I was talking about my Classical dance teacher. I left it aorund 15 years ago. But when I said, my ex-teacher has performed in a live programme, I did not like the word myself..
And then all teachers started crowding my memories..

I still remember sitting near my Jr KG teacher's chair. After completing whatever she had asked us to, I was caught doing a mischief :P. I dont remember her name though.

Then there was our Gracy Teacher for Sr. KG. She was such a sweetheart. I dont remember what she taught us, but I do remember the pleasant way she used to talk to us. Even if she always talked in English and I was too young, I knew I understood everything. On the day I forgot to take my Schoolbag, she had hugged me and quietened my tears. On the day I wore a Uniform Shirt-pant like boys, she had told me very sweetly that if you are a girl you should wear Pinafore and that it looks good on me. She passed away last month. I last met her some 3-4 years back and I feel there should have been another chance.. She was one teacher I remember who was never in any controversies, never heard any complaint or cross word about her. She remembered every student's name whichever class you are in. Gracy Teacher- May you rest in peace and I will never forget you.

Then there was my Marathi teacher who has been mentioned here.

Then Vrinda teacher, Beola Teacher, Pereira Teacher, Naik Teacher .. thats till standard 4th when we had only 1 teacher for all subjects.

From 5th-7th, teachers changed subject-wise. Vasantha teacher, Meenal teacher, Jyoti Teacher, Padmaja Teacher..

The in Final years of school, we had Sekar teacher, Bhalerao Teacher, Jignasa Teacher and the unforgettables Bhat Teacher & Bhat Sir.

Teachers after this stage were more professionals and less personally involved.

But I should mention, our Hostel Warden ARP sir, who loved us but always scolded us for lot of disciplinary goof-ups :P. Also Our IT Dept. Head and our Local Guardian in college - Prof R C Thool and his wife Thool Madam.. He is a gem of a person and always provided us with every facility and kept us free from the College Bureaucracy red tapes.

Its been a loong loong time since I met or contacted many of them. Hope this post starts a thread of communication!

There have been a lot more teachers teaching a lot at every walk of life.. I have just mentioned the Academia here :)

Time test

I believe Time test is the bestest (wanted to make it Best test, fir plan change).

I mean Time tells you, who wants to keep in touch with you and who doesnt. Becos for acquaintances , or forgotten friends, we wouldnt prioritize our time.
So also as time goes, we analyze our friendship more objectively, and if we think the other person is not worth your time, then out the person is from memory frames and "time"frames..

Yeah, I am a bit cross with a friend who doesnt have time to talk / chat / meet. But I felt like writing more becos I just chatted with 2 friends of mine - One was my roomie in college days and other cubicle mate in the first 2 years of my first Job. I was soo unable to connect for more than 2 minutes with them. While there is this another friend(who was originally a friend's sister, but turned out to be closer than the original friend :P), I can connect with her pretty fast, and we keep chattering for hours together-even if late nights. I guess its a part of life..

I do beleive time can distinguish a friend for you. No matter after how long are you meeting/talking/chatting, you can still pick up the thread of communication. You dont look for topics to talk with a good friend, they just keep flowing..

Dumbo

Sometimes I feel I am such a dumbo.. I havent been a fan of some genre of music.. i dont even know the right pronunciation of that word "genre".. People younger than me have taste for a specific "genre" .
Some of my colleagues are pursuing post graduations, doing weekend classes and what not.. even though I wanted to, I never ended up pursuing it with so much fervour.
There are other colleagues who have jumped ship so many times that with half experience than me, they are now earning nearly equal package. I havent ever given a thought. :) not that I have any particular reason..
There are these young people who are aware and conscious about the various career options they have and also have clear ideas on what they want. I have simply drifted along my way so far.. never had a clue about available opportunities or have fought for any particular thing..
There so many others that do a lot of things to improve their health. I dont find the find the motivation inside me.
(Not that I have not got it externally, but by experience, external motivation can push me only for a limited amount of time, I lose interest in a short span and end up having side effects)

The point remains, am I so much a dumb person ?

Is it just me?

Sometimes, do we all feel like bound by obligations that we cannot break or is it just me ?

Sometimes, we are compelled to take a decision professionally but emotionally its difficult conveying to the concerned person. Or is it just me facing this situation?

There is this colleague of mine, who has seen me over last 3 years. I have changed drastically in my behaviour over these years. I had a very hot temper and I used get frustrated angry with people who would not understand my view. Time and a lot of efforts has taught me to calm down and react after thinking. But for this colleague of mine, I guess she always has my old image in her mind when she speaks to me and so the conversation sometimes goes a little awry.. To avoid friction, I minimize interaction with her. I guess I am doing wrong by keeping the interaction to minimum, I am not giving a chance to her to adjust her perspectives.. But yet I feel, Does that happen to everyone or just me ?

I am not wondering why does that happen only to me .. But just wondering if I am normal or I just think too much about everything.. I guess as per my quote earlier, these things must also have a reason.. Need to brood over it to find out.

Enjoy !

How to deal with frustration

This is something I googled for "how to deal with frustration" It sounds good to me. Link is "http://www.life-with-confidence.com/frustration.html

The emotion you’re feeling is “Frustration”.
With a capital “F”. Maybe even add in some anger because you’ve been working really hard towards your goal or on a project and it just isn’t working. Or you feel like you’re stuck in a dead-end job and can’t find another one. And you may not even really know why. All you know is that you seem to be stuck and no matter how hard you try, you don’t seem to get anywhere. You’re just spinning your wheels in the mud and all you feel is pure frustration. Sound familiar?

This is the point where a lot of people will just say, “I Quit” and give up. Before you do though, here’s 8 ways you can blast through any frustration:

1. Ask Yourself, “What Is Working in This Situation?”
Even if feels like nothing is working, look closely and you will probably find at least something that is going right. So, that’s good. You’ve found something that’s working. Now, how do you improve it? By asking this question, you’ve taken yourself out of the negative mindset of “it’s hopeless” and are back to focusing on the positive.

There's something that’s working and that will give you a clue of what direction to focus on. You may find that even if your previous issues come up you’ll be able to resolve them in the process of concentrating on your improvements.

2. Keep an Accomplishments Log
Write down everything you accomplish in a log. If you do it in a monthly format you will be able to see all that you have accomplished in just one month. You may be surprised by how much you have done. If you realize there’s not much on the list, it may open your eyes to the fact that you may be procrastinating more than working or that you are using too much of your energy going in too many directions and that you need to focus more. Hopefully, you will have lots of items on your list then you can see that even though it may not feel like it, you are moving forwards. The log will also help to highlight where you were the most effective and where you need to work harder.

3. Focus On What You Want to Happen
Go back to the big picture. What is the desired outcome? Sometimes, we get so wrapped up in one problem and trying to solve it that we forget what we were originally trying to accomplish. Try not to ask yourself, “Why did this happen?” Asking questions like that will keep you rooted in the past. It doesn’t offer a solution to the problem. The important thing is knowing the answer to the following two questions:
- What do you want to happen differently this time?”
- What do you need to do in order to get there?

4. Remove the “Noise” and Simplify
When you’re trying to solve a problem, you can get so wrapped up in trying to find a solution that you add unnecessary clutter, noise, and tasks to a project because you thought they “might” be a solution.

Working on this website, I get bombarded by offer after offer of “easy ways to run your website”, “get more traffic”, “make more money” etc. They’re just noise though and usually a waste of my time even reading them. These people are just trying to make money off of me. They have no interest in whether I succeed or not. When people are frustrated by how slow the hard work process is taking, they get tempted by these “here’s what you’ve been missing” and “I’ll make it easy for you” offers. Usually, it ends up that if you do get tempted by the offers you discover 6 months down the road that if you had just stuck with your first plan and just kept working at it, you’d be a lot further ahead by now. Not to mention richer from not having spent money on the Get Rich Quick schemes. Believe in yourself. Simplify and go back to the basics. Determine what is really necessary and remove everything else. Anything that takes your time and effort that isn’t adding value, should be eliminated.

5. Multiple Solutions
You always have options. You just need to brainstorm and figure them out. Tell yourself you need to come up with 8 possible options to what you’re dealing with. Just knowing that you have lots of options will help to make you feel better. You won’t feel like you are trapped in one negative situation. From your list, figure out the best direction and go for it.

6. Take Action
When you get into serious frustration with a problem, you tend not to want to work on it anymore. It’s hard, it’s frustrating, and you’re not getting anywhere. So, anything to avoid having to be in that situation may be far more attractive. Procrastination may start to set in. If you can keep taking steps forwards, you will probably make it past this temporary hump. As Thomas Edison said, “Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up” and “Surprises and reverses can serve as an incentive for great accomplishment.”

The other thing that can happen is that you start to spend a lot of time worrying. Worrying is a definite way of energy and does not move you in a forwards direction. Only taking action will. Once you start moving forwards again, you will most likely find that you worried for no reason.

7. Visualize a Positive Outcome to the Situation
A lot of times you can get stuck on focusing on what you don’t want to happen or fearing the absolute worst thing that could happen. The top athletes of the world will imagine themselves competing flawlessly over and over again. There is no room for failure in their minds. This is what you need to focus on as well. See yourself achieving your desired outcome. What will it look like? What will it feel like? What will you say? How will you feel? Take the time to visualize it and really feel it. It will inspire you to keep moving forwards.

8. Stay Positive
Things are usually not as bad as they first appear. Sometimes, things seem much worse simply because we’re tired or mentally drained. Taking a break and remembering to keep your sense of humour can also help. This time of frustration will pass. A positive mind is far more open to solutions and answers than a negative one that thinks it’s just “hopeless” and thinks “what’s the use?” A closed mind will not be able to see the possible solutions when they do come along. Stay positive.

As with any problem, the solution is to figure out what your options are, decide on a plan, focus, and then take action. By using the above 8 steps, you should find that you’re running into fewer problems and feeling less frustration. Instead, you may find that you’re running into opportunities and you know exactly how to take advantage of them.